LOWDOWN Summer 2011 page 37

By any other name . . . .

by Tony Roberts

I read somewhere that the late Bob Hope had a Basset Hound called Recession. I thought this name a little odd on several counts.

Obviously the comic wanted to amuse people by giving the hound an original and unusual name. Funny old Bob, such a wag!

But I just didn’t understand the reasoning behind him picking Recession. I don’t think that this was during the 1930’s - when, anyway, Depression would have been much better - if only because it would also reference the Basset’s default expression.

I think that the novelist, Leslie Thomas, was wittier when he called his Basset Hound, Furlong.

Anyhow, this got me thinking generally about the names we impose upon our dogs.

Ask a young child to name a dog and and they often come up with a purely descriptive appellation; Spot, Goldie, Blackie, etc. (though, it would be best to disuade them from using the last chioce).

But as adults, we like to seem subtler, more smart.

We called our first Basset Hound, Boycott. Not after the Yorkshire batsmen, but because he refused to do anything we asked of him - he was on permanent strike.

Our second was named Sigmund - he was always on the couch. Following this German theme, we gave our third hound, Otto. After this, our reasoning became more obscure and tenuous - even to us!

The first U.S. president, George Washington, owned twelve Basset Hounds. I always associate him with a rather dour sobriety (though this could simply be due to seeing his portraits - apparently, he avoided smiling due to his primitive false teeth); but among the names he gave his hounds were, Drunkard, Tipler, Tipsy, and (bizzarely) Sweetlips. Best not to ask.

It is a hunting tradition to give all hounds a name containing with only two syllables; Ajax, Bellman, and Hotspur; and where this practise is not adhered to, three-syllable names are contracted to two, when hollered - so Saladin becomes ‘Saldin’. This is because two-syllable names are much easier to shout and carry across a field, especially over a long distance, i.e ‘Lola!’.

Though, one needs to be mindful of the consequences of shouting a seemily innocent name. Calling little Biscuit back in the park might attract every other mutt from far around, eager for a tit-bit.

Fashion also plays a part. Tyson still seems to be popular for many Staffordshire Bull Terriers and, naturally, Boxers. Though Fred for Basset Hounds is now considered passé and obvious by owners - but always expected by inquiring strangers.

At least dogs do not suffer any mental anguish from being given odd or inappropriate names; unlike the poor offspring of some celebrities who get given names such as Fifi Trixibell Geldof, Moon Unit Zappa and Zowie Bowie etc.

Not surprisingly, David Bowie’s son, Zowie, changed his name to Duncan Jones the minute he could crawl to the local Deed Poll office.

Miranda Harris told me that her daughter, Corinna, was at school with a girl whose name was Fruit Peters. Really. Her nickname, which even her mother used, was ‘Fruitcake’. Would you Adam and Eve it?

I was at art college with a really nice Irish chap called, Rick O’Shea.

Though we haven’t bumped into each other for ages.

I read somewhere that the late Bob Hope had a Basset Hound called Recession. I thought this name a little odd on several counts.

Obviously the comic wanted to amuse people by giving the hound an original and unusual name. Funny old Bob, such a wag!

But I just didn’t understand the reasoning behind him picking Recession. I don’t think that this was during the 1930’s - when, anyway, Depression would have been much better - if only because it would also reference the Basset’s default expression.

I think that the novelist, Leslie Thomas, was wittier when he called his Basset Hound, Furlong.

Anyhow, this got me thinking generally about the names we impose upon our dogs.

Ask a young child to name a dog and and they often come up with a purely descriptive appellation; Spot, Goldie, Blackie, etc. (though, it would be best to disuade them from using the last chioce).

But as adults, we like to seem subtler, more smart.

We called our first Basset Hound, Boycott. Not after the Yorkshire batsmen, but because he refused to do anything we asked of him - he was on permanent strike.

Our second was named Sigmund - he was always on the couch. Following this German theme, we gave our third hound, Otto. After this, our reasoning became more obscure and tenuous - even to us!

The first U.S. president, George Washington, owned twelve Basset Hounds. I always associate him with a rather dour sobriety (though this could simply be due to seeing his portraits - apparently, he avoided smiling due to his primitive false teeth); but among the names he gave his hounds were, Drunkard, Tipler, Tipsy, and (bizzarely) Sweetlips. Best not to ask.

It is a hunting tradition to give all hounds a name containing with only two syllables; Ajax, Bellman, and Hotspur; and where this practise is not adhered to, three-syllable names are contracted to two, when hollered - so Saladin becomes ‘Saldin’. This is because two-syllable names are much easier to shout and carry across a field, especially over a long distance, i.e ‘Lola!’.

Though, one needs to be mindful of the consequences of shouting a seemily innocent name. Calling little Biscuit back in the park might attract every other mutt from far around, eager for a tit-bit.

Fashion also plays a part. Tyson still seems to be popular for many Staffordshire Bull Terriers and, naturally, Boxers. Though Fred for Basset Hounds is now considered passé and obvious by owners - but always expected by inquiring strangers.

At least dogs do not suffer any mental anguish from being given odd or inappropriate names; unlike the poor offspring of some celebrities who get given names such as Fifi Trixibell Geldof, Moon Unit Zappa and Zowie Bowie etc.

Not surprisingly, David Bowie’s son, Zowie, changed his name to Duncan Jones the minute he could crawl to the local Deed Poll office.

Miranda Harris told me that her daughter, Corinna, was at school with a girl whose name was Fruit Peters. Really. Her nickname, which even her mother used, was ‘Fruitcake’. Would you Adam and Eve it?

I was at art college with a really nice Irish chap called, Rick O’Shea.

Though we haven’t bumped into each other for ages.

Rick O’Shea! A relative perhaps.

My mother was Eva O’Shea or so she always told me.

However later in life she said her maiden name was Shea.

So she was Eva O’Shea or Shea but her friends knew her by Eva.

Webmaster.

Fifi Trixibelle Geldof, named by Bob simply after his aunt Fifi, is perhaps the most ordinarily named of his daughters, Trixibelle can, it seems, be blamed on Paula Yates. She was followed by Peaches Honeyblossom and Little Pixie, then later by his adopted daughter Heavenly Hiraani Tiger Lily. They all seem quite charming to me.

In 1989 Fifi Trixibelle could be found prancing around with my daughter Corinna at the Jean Winkler dance class in Clapham, dated by Miranda’s memory of Paula bringing Fifi to the class carrying Peaches in her arms. Corinna and Fifi were the two rebels in the class.

Bob would appear with his video camera so maybe Corinna and Fifi star together in one of his cherished home movies. I wonder why he has never invited us round to look at them.

Webmaster.

Tony’s article was written at a time when Miranda and I were struggling to decide on a name for our new puppy.

After re-reading Tony’s article I think perhaps I should insist on calling ‘The Puppy with no name’, ‘Veto’

I didn’t, or was it, wasn’t allowed to, of course, she became Grenadilla, Dill for short.

Webmaster.

Cover of the Basset Hound Owners Club newsletter Lowdown

first published in LOWDOWN

editor Tony Roberts